The author has to stay in a hospital 50%  of his life. To check the level of the medicine in the blood doctors have to draw off blood every week. Three people holding Markus to fulfil the task. For an autist it is a very heavy emotion. To express his feelings Markus objectifies his pain via hurting appliances. "Old bleeding tv-sets and microwaves". Besides unpleasant feelings, Markus faces humiliation: doctors and nurses accuse him of shouting like a girl. Which is not appropriate, since he cannot control his fear and does not understand what is wrong behaving like a girl.

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